Farewell Cissy

 Karen Jo:  This is the last picture I took of Cissy and I'm glad she was out of her cave.  I was going to write a really upbeat post about Cissy.  She was moving around the house more and Monday morning I woke up to find her sleeping on my feet.  I had noticed that her abdominal muscles were working in an unusual manner on Sunday, but I thought she was working a hairball through or something.  Monday afternoon it became apparent that she was having difficulty breathing, so I called the vet and had her taken in on an emergency basis.  Her chest cavity was full of fluid.  She had only 1/4 breathing capacity.  The vet said she had the equipment and training to drain Cissy's chest, but she had only done it once before and fatal stuff could go wrong.  I told her to go ahead since Cissy was so bad already.  The vet came out again a few minutes later to tell me that Cissy had gone into cardiac arrest and I told her to just let Cissy go.  The vet had just set Cissy up for another x-ray so she could be sure of the best place to put the needle when Cissy decided that it was Rainbow Bridge time.  Brody was probably calling her.

 I missed Herman's remembrance day, which was Veteran's Day, so I thought I would just add it on here.  I was sad and lonely after my Mother's death and I found a notice of a cat who was sad and lonely and desperately needed a forever home.  He was FIV+ and FeLV+ so no one would adopt him.  I went to see him and it was love at first sight for both of us.  Herman got lonely for feline company and I heard about Emma and brought her home.  I have written many times about how they didn't get along, but most of the time they sort of got along.  There always seemed to be a truce at the buffet.  They greeted Cissy at the Bridge.

 Austin was also there to greet her and ask how his buddy Rocio was getting along.

Of course Brody ran to greet her.  I am sure they were both thrilled to be reunited.

On another note, Tabitha went to the vet for her first rabies shot and checkup.  She is 100% healthy and needs another FeLV test when she turns one, as she may be fighting it off now, as the vet noticed some activity in her lymph system. Go, Tabitha!

Farewell, Brody

 This is the last picture I took of Brody.  It was two weeks ago today.  I couldn't bear to take pictures of him wasting away.

This is the very first picture I took of Brody.  There are far too few pictures in between.

Brody's last vet visit was bad news and I didn't want to tell you that his temperature was 105.3 and he had fluid in his abdomen.  Luckily the fluid was where it was easily removed and Brody went back on Dex + B-12 and Lasix every day.  It didn't help.  By Sunday night, I knew that he was packing his bags for the Rainbow Bridge.  He didn't eat all day Monday and he had that sad. lost look in his eyes.  Monday night, he was waiting on the bed for me, just like he is in the picture. I cuddled up to him and started petting him and he got up on me in his favorite position, on my thigh with his head on my stomach.  I petted him until I fell asleep.  Sometime in the night, he left the bed, because when I woke up in the wee hours to pee, he wasn't there.  In the morning, I found him by the food in the computer room.  He had run away to the Bridge.  It was like he knew that he had to eat, but he couldn't do it.

I took the body into the kitchen on a kitty comforter and laid him down near Cissy's cave.  I wanted her to know what happened to him.  She came and sniffed over and over again, like she couldn't believe it.  I think all the kitties sniffed him at least once.  I called the vet to cancel his appointment, which was this afternoon.  After a while, I took his body to the vet to be cremated.  I brushed off a bunch of fur and put it in a plastic bag, because I knew that the private cremation was so much more expensive than the communal cremation.  Isn't it silly that after spending at least $5000 to keep him alive, I wouldn't spend $70 to get his ashes?  It's just the way I feel.  Everything that was the Brody I loved so much went to the Rainbow Bridge.  What was left was just a shell.  I can feed the other cats for a month on that $70.

I will order him a plastic tombstone from the company I get them from and get a solar light from the store and bury half his fur next to Austin. I'm crying too hard to see well, so I'll quite now.

Happy Birthday at the Rainbow Bridge, Austin

Karen Jo:  It's kind of a sad day here.  Austin would have been one year old today.  I did manage to get him a birthday present.  A week or so ago some jerk came by and stole three of my four solar lights, including the ones marking Herman's and Austin's graves.  Whoever it was didn't get Emma's because I buried her right next to the house and her light can't be seen from the street.  Today I went out and got replacements for the stolen lights.  The store didn't have the stars, so I got a sunflower for the front yard and hummingbirds for Herman and Austin.  A hummingbird was what I originally chose for Austin, so he got a straight replacement.  I hope whoever it was doesn't come by and steal them again.  I did put Herman's and Austin's much farther from the fence, so someone would have to actually come into my back yard to get them.

We still miss Austin, Rocio in particular.  Rocio misses Austin the most at meal time.  I would feed the two of them in the safe room and close the door, so they wouldn't hassle Oja while she was eating.  These days, most of the time, instead of running for his dish, Rocio just lies on the floor, looking very sad.  I have begun placing his food next to his head when he does this, or he will just lie there and Bambino will eat his Stinky Goodness.  He rouses himself to eat and shares with Bambino, who insists on sharing with all the boys.

I know you are having a grand time at the Rainbow Bridge, Austin, but we miss you down here.  I imagine you and Herman play chase and kitty rasslin' a lot, while Emma watches.

We Hardly Knew Ye, Austin

This is the last picture I ever took of Austin.  He was just settling down for his afternoon nap on Thursday.  Thursday night he ran off to the Rainbow Bridge.  He had a great and busy day Thursday.  He ate his breakfast and finished up Spyro's and Oja's breakfasts for them, then he wanted to play.  He chased Spyro down the hall a couple of times.  He and Spyro were great at THoE and Rocio often joined in.  He rassled with Rocio.  He batted toys around.  After nap time I even found out why I sometimes heard Oja give a big hissy, but nothing seemed to be bothering her when I went to investigate.  This time I saw the whole thing.  Oja was ambling along, headed to the kitchen for a bite to eat or a drink of water when Austin pounced.  Oja hissed and Austin ran off, probably having a little kitty laugh to himself.  Lately I had been getting the idea that Austin liked surprising Oja and making her squeal or hiss.  A little later I got out a wand toy and the fun was on.  Austin was standing up on his hind feet to catch the mousie and even leaping up and catching it in midair.  At sundown, he joined in the kitty playtime of more chasing and rasslin'.  He had a short rasslin' match with Spyro.  He ate his dinner with gusto, again finishing up anything any other cat left behind.  The house settled down to the evening routine of some playing and a bit of napping.  I have a light on a timer in the living room that goes on in the late evening.  I set it up long ago so that I wouldn't come home to a dark house from work.  The light going on usually signals another round of kitty playtime.

About eleven I went into the kitchen for a glass of iced tea and saw Austin lying on his side on the floor with Rocio also lying down, resting his head on Austin's haunches.  I thought how cute they looked napping together, though it struck me that it was unusual to see them on the floor.  After I got my tea I was about to walk by them again when I thought something didn't look right about Austin.  I bent down to pet him and check him out and sure enough, he had run off to the Rainbow Bridge.  I picked him up and laid him on the sofa on a fleece blanket and Rocio joined him.  Rocio spent the night on the couch with Austin.  The two of them loved each other as if they were litter mates.  I slept poorly that night and without kitty company.  I think they held a kitty wake in the living room.

Fairly early in the morning, but late enough that the vets should be through with morning surgery, I called to talk to vet about what could have happened.  Austin had FeLV, but he never showed any symptoms of being ill, just the opposite.  The vet told me that from how I described finding him and thinking he was just asleep at first that it must have been sudden heart failure.  He could have been born with a heart defect that didn't cause a murmur or any symptoms until the heart just stopped.  He had just turned 10 months old.  Rocio is heart-broken and spent the day yesterday lying in the pink hammock where he and Austin often napped together.  Spyro spent the day in the blue cat bed by the heat vent, keeping Rocio company, but not crowding him and doing his own mourning.  Oja spent the day in my room, giving the boys their space.  At twilight, Spyro batted the balls in the Turbo Track a few times and Rocio showed some interest.

It was interesting to me to see the kitties comforting each other.  Spyro and Oja had a long mutual grooming session that did not end in a rasslin' match.  After dinner that night Spyro and Rocio shared a chair, cuddling with a little gentle pushing and mock biting.  At bedtime Rocio wanted me to comfort him and let me know by jumping up on me and pushing my chin with his head.  I petted him and talked to him a little bit.  He stayed there for quite a while for him, then left to share a chair with Spyro.  I am so glad that I adopted Austin and Rocio.  Had they been in their previous foster home, Rocio would have had no kitty company to comfort him.  Spyro and Rocio have helped each other tremendously with their grief and all the kitties have helped me with mine.

I buried Austin next to Herman.  Interestingly there seems to be a volunteer flower growing next to Herman's grave.  I was careful not to disturb in when I buried Austin.  I got him a hummingbird light.  If you have seen these solar-powered garden lights on stakes, you will know what I am talking about.  They are basically a stake with a couple of solar collectors in the middle and a clear plastic shape on top.  At night they shine with  a light that changes colors.  I love them and decided to use them to mark the kitties' graves.  Emma got a dragonfly, Herman has a star and Austin has a hummingbird.

You went much too soon, Austin, and we all miss you terribly.  We will see you again at the Bridge.  In the meantime, I know that you will have a blast. Say hi to Herman and Emma for us.

Goodbye, Emma

Karen Jo: I want to thank all of you for purring so hard for Emma.  It really means a whole lot to me. This is the most recent picture that I have of Emma that shows her and her personality well.  She ran off to the Rainbow Bridge last night.  It all happened so dang fast.  Tuesday she was running and playing and being my lap cat and Saturday night she's gone.  I keep asking myself if I missed something, but I don't think I did, really.  She was a bit more subdued after the fight with Herman, but not much.  She was a bit more leery of Herman, but I thought that quite normal.  The vet checked her over very carefully and there was no sign of any injury.  Wednesday, she hid all day.  Thursday she was lethargic and I whisked her off to the vet, who found nothing.  Friday she was weaker, but still jumped up in the easy chair to sleep on the fake sheepskin cushion.  Saturday she seemed about the same during the day.  She was moving around the room, though very slowly.  I sat with her for over an hour starting about 4:00.  She was over by her bed, soaking up the heat from the heat vent and I went over and spent some time petting her.  She made some funny little noises, like she was maybe in a little bit of pain, so I stopped petting her and went to the easy chair to read.  After a bit, she walked over to lie beside the chair, where I could easily reach her and I started petting her again.  I kept on petting her until I had to get up to go to the bathroom.  When I got back, she was in her hidey-hole, too far back for me to reach her.  I checked on her hourly, but she stayed in her hidey-hole until I found her in the litter box at 9:00.  She had gotten in and done her business, then hadn't the strength to get out again.  When I picked her up to put her on the floor, she was so limp that I think I knew, deep down, that she wouldn't last the night.  I got the syringe and gave her some baby food because I didn't want to believe it.  I petted her and talked to her, but she was very unresponsive.  I left her and left the light on because I didn't want her to be in the dark  I came back at 10:00 and gave her some more baby food, petted her and talked to her, again with very little response.  I stayed as long as I could, but seeing her like that was more than I could bear for long.  When I came back at 11:00 she seemed cool to the touch and I think she had already gone, but I didn't want to believe it.  When I checked her at midnight, there was no denying it.  Rigor mortis had set in.

I slept very little last night.  I wrote her a limerick, because I had to do something other than lie in bed and wonder if I could have done anything differently.  I will be posting it a little later.  She is still there on the floor of her room.  This morning, I opened the door to her room and took Herman back to see her.  He sniffed her paw for quite a while, then went around to his little hidey-hole under the sewing machine.  He was attracted to her food, but kept looking back at Emma. Finally, he reached out and very gently touched her paw.  Then he nibbled on her kitten food and left the room.  In a little bit I will go out and find the shovel and see if the soil is frozen or if I can dig her a grave.  There is a spot under the living room window just across from the bird feeder where I can bury her. If the soil is frozen, I will put her in the garage until tomorrow when I can contact the vet about having her cremated.

Most people stop blogging for a while after losing a loved one, but I think I will be blogging more.  I need to keep my mind occupied and it's good to know that other kitties are having birthdays and gotcha days and house trashing parties.  Goodbye, my dear sweet Emma.  I will miss you so much.